Why you no boyfren ah?
CNY's coming & looks like I've to face the "boyfriend music" again....
Here's my top 10 list of answers for those KPCs who ask "Do you have a bfyet?":
1) I've a bf. Just that he has a very bad sense of direction so he hasn't found me.
2) My bf's sailing... & sailing...
3) I like Martians.
4) I like mat sallehs. My girlfriends married all those I know.
5) Oh, didn't my mom tell you? My bf died. His name was Saddam.
6) It didn't work out. My bf wanted a change. A sex change.
7) *gasp* I didn't invite you for my wedding? Nevermind, I'll invite you for my next one.
8) I don't have a bf. I've a gf.
9) Here's my bf, the invisible man.
10) My bf? Didn't you see him running around the house? He has a beard & he's trap inside a dog's body. Ito....
Dial G-O-D
Over the weekend, I was depositing some money through a cash deposit machine at a bank when the machine jammed, with all my money in it. Since the bank was closed, I couldn't get help. In a blink of an eye, a few thousand bucks was gone - my hard earned paycheck & half month bonus. Stunned, I punched & kicked the machine but the words, "Out of service" continued flashing. I didn't know what to do except "sms" a couple of friends to pray for me while I figure out what to do next.
This morning, I hopped over to the bank & was I surprised to find the money already deposited into my account. Relieved, I walked over to the next shop to top-up my prepaid phone card. The lady at the shop handed me a gift. It's one of those accessories people hang on their handphones, which blinks when a call is coming through. They come in all shapes & sizes. At that particular "china-man" shop, the last shape I expected to see was, a "cross". It didn't blink but I knew the call went through.
God bless my friends.
Malaysia for me
We were at Tesco last night. My dad was hanging around when a small malay boy started calling him "Apek". The boy went on saying "apek... apek..." for awhile. Suddenly, a lady came over, *slap left slap right* & yelled, "Oi,kenapa you panggil orang apek ah?" Then she looked up at my dad & said,"Ehh.... cikgu!..." While they chatted, the small boy 'salam'ed & "cium"ed dad's hand.
You know, this might make a good raya ad.... hahaha...
Cinderella Wedding
My dad & I was watching some silly show on tv last night when he suddenly remembered they were telecasting S & K's wedding. We only managed to catch the last half hour. The moment we switched the channel, the first face we saw was Dr M, then Najib, etc. The VIPs were all sitting (solo) in a row,on a long table facing the stage. Funny how they arranged it that way was b'cos I initially thought it was a political conference rather than a wedding. In between the long table & the stage are round tables. The interior must have been obscenely expensive. Not that it's not nice... butI guess, in the real world, a fairytale would need many more waves of paper or plastic wands to come true.
S walked in, in her Cinderella outfit, a perfect theme to a rags-to-riches example.... except, in this case, it is deemed that the concept works both ways with K getting rich. Credit has to be given to the make-up artist for using the right powder foundation which not only absorbed all the oil & patched the wrinkles, but also plastered a plastic smile on K's face. Poor K would probably have to massage his face back to normal after smiling forso long. Fyi, the ceremony took more than 3 hours - the ministers looked bored, the MCs were out of breath with speeches that seem to solely consists of protocol openings (3 sultans were present) & the other attendees seemed to be in cloud nine.
Liked the part where they wrote, "27-year-old bla bla wore a bla bla whileher 47-year-old Prince Charming (?) wore a matching outfit." in the press. Btw, the 47-27 number sure makes a lot of sense when said in Cantonese e.g."sei chart" (which also means keep brushing/scraping) & "yee chart" (easyto brush/scrape).
Apparently, S planned to go on a carriage round KLCC but they cancelled it. Perhaps it turned into a pumpkin too soon. Some Indon fans were disappointed cos they purposely flew over to see the horse.... wait... no,the horse carriage... huh, the horse sitting in the carriage?...whatever... S ended up waving to her fans from a balcony. Think they got abit confused between Cinderella & Rapunzel... Um, at least Prince Charming still has hair.
After the cake cutting session, S sang a song she wrote herself after her earlier engagement. Can't remember the title but the only words that stoodout were, "....cinta sejati....bukan pasal harta..." Fact is, who's milking who? After all, she'a worth a whopping 40 million+/-.
My dad, who was overwhelmed with all the extravagance, sounded like a lizard going "tsk tsk tsk" till the end of the show.
A Ride with Raj
Took a lift home from Raj one of those days when my mom was on mc. We felt the car jerk right after we drove past the former Kotamas. "Oh no... Don't tell me my brother didn't fill up last night!" His meter wasn't working & he was on too tight a budget to fix it. The car engine died but we continued "gliding".
We looked ahead & a Mobil station was just about a couple of metres ahead. Together we were chanting, "reach... reach...reach..." We were both focusing on the Mobil signage as if it was the tape at the end of a marathon. I said to Raj, "Whatever it is, don't step on the brakes!" We noticed a motorbike stopping at the side of the road. The biker looked like he wanted to cut across to the next lane. He stared at us. We stared back. I waved frantically for him to move quickly. He moved... right in front of the car. Raj had to step on the brakes. It was only as we got out of the car to push that we realise we were on a slope. I jumped back into pull the hand brake while the car slided backwards with Raj trying to stop it. "You know, I bet some of our colleagues will be passing by at this hour. Let's wave...", I said.
Raj found it embarassing so he ended up walking to Mobil to get help. 2 guys came to the rescue. We pushed & pushed. When I reached home, my dad asked what happened. My hair was in a mess. After he finished laughing about the incident, he gave a suggestion."Go tell your friend. If he's too broke to fix the meter, the cheapest wayto know when his tank is about empty is to put a golf ball in the tank!"
God's Painting
20th April 2006
God made a painting this morning. My mom & I were on the way to work when we realised we were driving right into a multi-coloured arc. For the first time in my life, I witness a rainbow so perfect. The sky was clear, withjust the right touch of sunlight which reflected the 7 colours prominently,stretching a few miles across. As we drove closer, I searched for its end.Its rays landed on a small selection of properties which spawn a field of gold. The moment I reached the office, I raced towards my colleague's cubicle.The camera is locked in her drawer. She wasn't in. I knew I had to let itgo.
Then, another colleague walked in & said, "Been years since I've seen such a huge rainbow. It made my day!". It was only when I spoke to others about it had I realised that so few captured the moment. A moment I know, my grandchildren will hear about. Amen.
Grace
May 17th, 2005
Remember I mentioned bout my boss' daughter who's a Down child withLeukemia?
My boss sms-ed some of us informing that she was in critical condition. Herplatlet count was only 7K (normal people = 100K+). But when they brought her home, she was so excited, she kept playing with the pc & refused torest. When we visited, her typical antics & gestures made us all laugh. Sheseemed ok. In fact, pretty active. But we've been told that it's hard totell with these kind of illness. The patient can simply be up one moment &down the next. They tried to boost the platlet by giving Grace jabs but itdidn't work. Her lips kept bleeding... Quite bad. She looked like she haslipstick on. Because she has ulcers, she kept asking for milk instead ofsolid food. To think it all started with a flu.Grace's sister, Faith celebrated her birthday 2 weeks ago & one of theguests had flu.
It infected a couple of them including Grace. Where Graceis concern, she has to be sent to GH evertime she gets sick, even if it'sjust flu. Her dad, who's been monitoring her progress, was in Hong Kongthen. The doctor in charge at the time wasn't familiar with Grace's case.He/She put her on chemo/strong medication, not knowing that Grace's bodyjust can't cope with that kind of treatment any more. Nevertheless, Gracewas strong.
Actually, for a Down child, she has never given much problems to her familyexcept for the medical needs. You should've seen the tons of medicine &jabs she had to put up with. Still, she always manages to cope. The nurses& patients at GH love her.
My mom called yesterday to check & she could hear the kids playing in thebackground. Grace's appetite has improved & she has been asking for milk &also, noodles consistently. She even urges her maids for fast delivery.
Today, I came to know of the news by chance. The HR manager called me &asked bout funeral precedures... What a way to find out.
Grace's mom, May, is due for labour this week. She didn't take it very wellwhen Grace was in GH last week. Can't begin to imagine her agony now.Though the family was given time & notice, I don't think it helped much.After all, which proper family would be braced for this?
I dread the thought of facing them... We'll be leaving the office to visit soon. Honestly, I didn't think it'd hurt this much... Unlike my mom who's known my boss & his wife even before they were married, I've only come toget accustomed to this family after I returned to M'cca. Yet...
Guess it's coz Grace is just a child. It's always worse when it's a child.And it doesn't help that this is a special one. Her dad calls her "AmazingGrace".A few days back, I bought a soft toy for Grace & Faith. Chosed a puppy forFaith & an elephant for Grace with a message for her to be strong. But I didn't have the time or chance to hand the toys to them. I think the elephant's more appropriate for Faith now.Reema just called, asked us to keep it quiet & not call the family for now.
Needed to pour it out to someone so I thought of writing you...The world suddenly stopped & it has started raining. Work is simply meaningless at a time like this.
Something happened last night
The dogs barked ferociously. Awaken from my slumber, I covered my head with my pillow & wished for them to stop. Some stupid cat or mutt must've trespassed the area again. They didn't stop. Normally, my dad would be up in a jiff & he'd shut them up. No sounds of a room door opening. The dogs started to growl. I jumped out of bed. It's definitely not a cat or mutt.
As I switched on my room light, I stepped into a puddle. Drats. It was raining heavily & the roof must be leaking again. I was about to headstraight towards the commotion when I stopped. A thousand & one thingsflashed through my mind. What if it's a robber? What if it's another one ofthose snakes? I looked up at the clock on the wall & realises that it's 1am. A couple of hours ago, my family & I was watching a great match ofhockey at the Commonwealth games followed by American Idol followed by... a true story of a haunted premise on Discovery. I chickened out.
My folks were still asleep till I opened their room door. They sat up &quickly got out of bed. My mom instructed me to switch on all the lights.When we reached the kitchen, I looked out the door & noticed that the dogs were barking in one direction. From my angle, I could only see its scaly2.5 feet tail lashing about, similar to a scene from Aliens. Yup, it's one of those indian delicacies you skinned & cooked for your pals, except bigger.
The monitor lizard ran blindly into one of the dog cages & was clinging onto the side while trying to whip the dogs - a heck of an acrobatic stunt.We opened the kitchen door. It dashed out of the cage & into the dark.This morning, I found all 3 dogs huddled up in one cage.
p/s: Hope you were entertained. If you weren't, too bad. These are probablythe only kind of "entertainment" you'd find in a place like Melaka.
